Piñatas Factory ~ 451 Arrow Hwy ~ Glendora ~ (626) 852-9595

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800 W. 163rd St. & Vermont ~ Gardena

Rapid Transit Cycle Shop ~ Chicago, IL.

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Yer Cheat’N Heart Tattoo & Body Piercing ~ 15400 S. Vermont Ave. ~ Gardena

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Slauson Swap Meet ~ 1600 W. Slauson Ave. Los Angeles, CA 90047

You all dress like crap and you know it. I’m hardly one to say shit, I wear the same thing everyday. And not even a variation on the same thing, just the same thing. These clothes, like so many dead hoors, just happen to be laying on my floor in the morning. While I do smell like someone’s grandpa, jettisoning my personal dignity has never felt so soft and comfortable in the past. But we have no excuse to bemoan a lack of shoes with a sole (I won’t name names) or wear t-shirts from corporate picnics in 1987 that we didn’t even attend, in states we’ve never seen!

Deals in nice-looking clothes abound in and around Los Angeles’s zillion-deep “swap meets.” These are not the open-air markets of your childhood, but in true SoCal fashion, many small stores mobbed up together in an effort to get money. From Venice to Ontario their rows glitter with the latest in gorgeous designer knockoffs and yesterday’s trends. Baseball caps, bandanas, underwear, and basics like t-shirts are found by the arm-load at the prices they should be. So fuck Target (thought they do have a much better return policy).

The most famous of all our swap meets is no doubt the Slauson Super Mall. A mecca in L.A. for great, inexpensive shopping, it has passed into the realm of cultural institution through the lyrics spit about it through ages of G’d up tracks. Set on the tracks itself, between Normandie and Western on Slauson Ave., the swap meet is a colossal square of gray cement topped with a Miami Vice-colored crown.

Penetrating at one of three entry points finds you greeted by corner-side displays of white sneakers, Timboots, and 14K gold and fake ice pieces. The ingenuity of some of the designs is worth a look on the fake ice, who doesn’t want a basketball-that-rotates-on-a-turntable-chain in one way or another? The shoes and lids found in the swap meet can be sick. A purple Indian graces a Cleveland Hat and old school Lakers Converse await in home and away flavors, that kind of thing. It’s well worth a look to check out more than a few stores in this category for something unique or rare.

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Blacksmith’s Corner ~ 17647 Lakewood Blvd. ~ Bellflower

Don’s Auto Center ~ 2042 E. South St. ~ Long Beach

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Jewelry Store ~ Broadway and 6th ~ Downtown LA